Working Mommy

The other night I was at a professional group with other coaches and noticed an interesting chain of events:

1. I told a man what I do professionally
2. He nodded, understanding
3. I mentioned that I have a 3-year-old
4. He looked confused; asked whether I "work, too"
5. I was taken by surprise and got a little flustered; tried to explain that I am both a "full-time professional" and a "real mom" (whatever that means!)

This isn't the first time I have noticed myself struggling to describe the balance of my professional status and motherhood. I know that full-time moms struggle with the reverse of this situation. I am still working on the best way to present my work/life situation - a way to accurately describe that I am both a professional and a mom.

Any ideas that you have would be greatly appreciated!

What is Balance?

I have been thinking a lot about my score on the "Wheel of Life" assessment that I took and I'm actually wondering whether I should pay too much attention to it. After all - isn't balance a constantly-evolving thing?

For the most part, my wheel is average, but the reason it looks so bumpy is that I have some extremely high levels of satisfaction in certain parts of my life.

While I can certainly work to get my low levels higher, wouldn't creating a perfect wheel include either lowering my ratings of the high parts of my life (to achieve a homogeneous balance) or striving for "perfection" in all areas of my life? This just doesn't seem realistic. Thus, while I find the wheel helpful for illuminating some areas in which I could use some bolstering, I'm not going to worry too much about making the wheel a perfect circle.

After all ... many of the most wonderful roads in the world are bumpy.

3 Things I Learned from "Getting Things Done"

Getting Things Done is a great book that covers all sort of organizational concepts. It's pretty overwhelming if you think that you have to do everything suggested, so I thought it might be helpful to break down the concepts that I gleaned from the book that have improved my office (and life) organization:

1. Alphabetize your files - I know this sounds silly, but for some reason I never did this. I think that I just figured I don't have enough files. Well, now that I've done it, I can find files so much faster, and it makes the act of filing almost pain-free.


2. Organize your to-do list - The book has a little bit of a crazy system in which you have both short- and long-term to-do lists. This was a bit much for me, but I did sit down and figure out exactly what type of to-do list would work for my lifestyle, and it is making a difference in my productivity.
   


3. Commit to a single calendar and keep it up-to-date - Again, this is such a simple thing, but it really made an impact when I took a look at the calendaring system I was using and discovered that it wasn't quite fitting my needs. I immediately went to Staples and found the calendar of my dreams, and it has kept me on-track ever since.

Work-Life Soundtrack

Each morning, I schedule 30 minutes of self care (quick meditation, a cup of tea and daydreaming), and 30 minutes of work while my little one watches a video. Thus, my work-life soundtrack consists of songs from Dora the Explorer. At least it is positive - I find myself singing "We did it! We did it! We did it!" all day as a result of my office being next to her bedroom.

Ah ...the joys of working from home.

I am not Superwoman

Sometimes I have to be really careful when planning my work days. With just three full days available on which to schedule meetings, I have a tendency to over-book them.

Back-to-back meetings were totally do-able (and didn't require a second thought!) before my daughter was born. In the past three years, however, although it is possible for me to make it through a fully-booked day, it can be really dangerous for my physical and mental health.

I end up feeling depleted, have almost nothing left to give to my family in the evening, and there is definitely no room for self-care. Without the energy to bolster myself, this depletion extends into the following work day, making the cycle come full-circle and thus impact both my personal and my professional lives.

Today I didn't realize that I had (once again) booked myself in back-to-back intensive meetings until I was halfway through them. Luckily, I was able to squeeze in 15 minutes between my mid-day and afternoon meetings to breathe deeply and realize what I had done. Then, as soon as my afternoon meeting was complete, I went home, took a bath, and sat on the couch daydreaming for 30 minutes before diving into the piles of paperwork that accumulate after a day of meetings.

Based on these actions, I was able to get a lot of work done in the hour between my daydreams and the excited "MOMMY!" that came from downstairs when my daughter came home. I was able to leave my desk and greet her and my husband with joy and excitement and even, yes, a little bit of energy.

Is this balance? I'm not sure, but it definitely feels better than trying to be Superwoman!

Core Strength, or just pain?

Feeling virtuous and ambitious one day last week, I ordered the Gaiam BalanceBall Chair, which is supposed to strengthen my core muscles and improve spinal alignment while I work. Sounds brilliant, right?

It's definitely better than just sitting on a plain old exercise ball at my desk, since that thing was always getting in my way and I could just never get it to the right height.

I can already feel it in my "core," but I can also feel it in my neck a little bit. Hmmm ... I think I may need to tweak the ball inflation a little bit.

Keeping healthy and fit seems to be a full-time job with a lot of requirements!

Maintaining Balance Even When You Stop Spinning

With the Thanksgiving activities, I haven't had my typical balanced routine of my usual childcare schedule on the following days:

Monday: 9-6
Tuesday: 2-6
Wednesday: 10-2
Thursday: 9-6
Friday: 10-4

Instead, I have been spending time with family and taking care of my daughter. Don't get me wrong - it has been absolutely wonderful, but I must admit that I find myself a little bit off-kilter, feeling unusually stressed and uncomfortable. I think it must be because I'm off my routine, but still at home. I think (and hope!) that if I were on vacation (away from home), then I would be able to relax. Instead, I'm looking forward to Monday morning when I can get back into my routine!

Geez!

I'd like to think that this is somewhat normal given the fact that I have created a work-life balance that works for me, and so throwing off my routine has been disorienting.

Let me know if you ever feel this way, and if you have any examples of how you find balance when your routine is disrupted.

Working From Home - Choices

Some days it feels like there are just so many choices to make!

Some of the 5,000 choices for me yesterday included unloading the dishwasher (which I absolutely HATE doing, but it's a good excuse for not filing paperwork!), filing paperwork, writing a marketing plan for one of my clients, and sitting on the couch, daydreaming.

Hmmm... the joys of working from home.